This past week I had the privilege of my first big book signing/reading. I was a bundle of nerves. It was not the idea of getting up before people that unnerved me, rather the fact that this event was to take place in a large secular bookstore. All of my previous experiences had been in the context of the Christian community. This was my first venture outside of that safety net.
My husband and I arrived early, allowing sufficient time to get set up and get a feel for the atmosphere. As we walked through the doors, the first thing that caught my attention was my picture on a poster advertising the event. These posters were placed strategically throughout the store. Rather than giving me added confidence, they caused my knees to quake and self-doubt to rise within me. A battle raged.
Three months earlier, God had led me to the Scripture, “Therefore, since we have such a hope, we are very bold.” (2 Corinthians 3:12) I claimed those words and made a commitment before the Lord to step out in boldness. I acknowledged God’s promise that He would go before me and I set out in boldness. Now with only a half hour before the event I questioned the wisdom of that choice.
Krista, the young lady assigned as the event coordinator, greeted me and began to set things in order. In a short time, the area was transformed – bookshelves were wheeled away and in their place chairs were set up. A podium and microphone were placed at the front, as well as a book display with my book. I marveled that these things were being set in place for me – I was the reason that people had been invited.
The guests began to arrive. They looked eager to be there. Warm smiles adorned their faces. I began to see familiar faces - faces of my relatives and faces of friends from the past. As I was greeted with hugs and encouragement the fear began to fade away. I began to relax and to enjoy the moment.
A steady stream of guests arrived and more and more chairs were added. The turnout was beyond my wildest dreams. I had stepped out in humility telling God I would be honored to be His ambassador and He had obviously gone before me.
Krista, the coordinator, gave me a fine introduction before inviting me to the podium. As I walked down what had become a long aisle between the chairs my confidence grew – my confidence was not in myself, but in the God who had gone before me. The nerves that had threatened to unglue me were no longer there. I felt honored to represent my Lord.
God was incredibly faithful. As I stood before that crowd, I knew that I wanted more than anything else, to share the testimony of God’s presence in our life.
It is my honor, it is my joy Lord, it is my privilege to worship you . . . to God be the Glory great things He has done.
